It’s Not All Sunshine & Unicorns

Yes, we’ve all told each other we had a great Christmas, whether we did or not. It’s the polite thing to do.

How we normally respond is socially acceptable. I remember the years of hard Christmases, especially the year our Grandpa died on Christmas Eve. The home movies of us opening gifts looked somber and just sad. People who have losses of loved ones aren’t having a great time, either. My dad died December 7, 1988. Christmas was terrible.

It isn’t just the people who experience losses who have a bad/hard Christmas. Dysfunctional families really have an unbelievable Christmas for sure. I experienced some of that this year, but not on Christmas. It was the day after. I shared some of our fabulous beef tenderloin, spinach/sweet potato salad, and 2 desserts with a person I’ve known for a long time. Long story, short story. It did not turn out like I planned. I was happy to deliver some food, a gift of love, but was met with lots of discontent and misunderstanding. Yelling ensued, which I don’t do well with. I don’t yell in response, I am quiet. This time, it ended up differently.

What did I do? What I wish I’d learned years ago. I was horribly uncomfortable. I simply turned around and said, “I have to leave.” First time in my 70 years of life I’ve done that. I avoided a verbal assault, having to defend my intentions, etc., and left the guilt, the feeling bad, the feelings of rejection at the door of the person I tried to do something nice for. I didn’t bring it home with me.

I am grateful I’ve finally learned it’s not my fault. I didn’t cause the problem. It’s them, not me. It’s one of the greatest gifts I’ve ever received. And the Babe is the person who has told & taught me to be stronger. Don’t let people do that to me. I’m grateful for the Babe; the gift who keeps on giving. And did I tell you, 25 years ago Christmas Eve, he asked me to marry him? Years ago, I told his sweet Mom, “Every day is Christmas with the Babe.” She laughed. Loved that lady.

I want to encourage anyone who needs to hear it; often, it’s not your problem. It’s their problem, you didn’t cause it. 2023 will be the start of helping others in a way I haven’t before. You need to claim what is your fault; what is their fault is what they need to claim.

Life is a two-way street and the yield signs are not all on your side. — Kathy Raabe, 2022

Self-care includes sticking up for yourself. Learn it, practice it, before it’s too late. Be safe out there and see you tomorrow!

But WAIT! There’s MORE . . .

Snow in the forecast today, Thursday, and Sunday. That’s as of this minute. It’ll do what it does. No need to fret about it. Isn’t fret a fabulous word? (My guitar playing friends won’t like this definition of the word.) To fret is to worry.

In contrast, Wikipedia defines it as a guitarist would. Fretting is wear and sometimes corrosion damage at the asperities of contact surfaces. (Yes, that’s what HE said). But to use the old definition of it, worry (fretting) erodes at your happiness and mental health if it goes long enough. I get it. People don’t like the snow, and I’m getting a little tired of it myself. It is a part of our lives in Nebraska. I prefer to concentrate on the beauty rather than the bother involved with it.

Yes, I have shoveled mountains of snow when I was a single mom. We lived on a busy corner, with a bus stop at our front sidewalk. It required extra care. The City trucks always buried us when they went by. I have done my fair share of removal. When my back went bad, the kids were great at helping. Of course we lived at the top of a hill with little snow removal. It made for all kinds of fun. At least my kids all learned a vital skill – driving in snowy Nebraska winters.

I didn’t even notice until this morning yesterday’s blog didn’t publish. I forgot I had to change my Facebook password yesterday. I share the blog to Facebook upon publishing. It didn’t work and held the whole deal up. Sorry about my inattention.

Yesterday about noon my good day derailed, and the result was a poor attitude. I try extra hard when that happens to not be b*% ^. I think I succeeded. And then the e-mail I’ve been waiting for arrived. It’s all good now. I need to remember sooner when I get overwhelmed (and I do it to myself!) with too much to do, too little time, too much to learn, I get stressed. The best cure it to stop working and do something you need. I took a nap. Then I read.

Later in the day, I looked at the reading material I keep next to my recliner. It was all books for learning – there was not one there to read for “fun.” I gathered them all up and put them on my desk extension for later. My brain is tired. It wants to have some fun. So it will have some fun. Timing was right for my latest Amazon order – in the blizzard like conditions of yesterday, they delivered three separate packages!

What a Haul from Amazon Yesterday!

Besides another copy of Corgi’s in the Wild, a children’s book by my friend author Gabbie Weick; Rachael Ray’s small grater; a cheat sheet for using Publisher with a small book of “How to Learn Microsoft Publisher QUICKLY!” (I’ve used Publisher before, but need a refresher and reference); I received new author Joshua Berkov’s two books; The Enlightenment of Angeline, and The Enlightenment of Esther.

Joshua Berkov is a Librarian by day. The rest of his author blurb from the back cover tells of his education, his life with his partner and two cats, and how he loves to make people laugh. Because of the making people laugh, I ordered both books. It’s the balance I need right now. I’ll let you know how they were. I love the description of the principal character; “Angeline Sims is no shrinking violet. She’s tough, opinionated, and bossy, and she’s got a bone to pick with nearly everyone in her life.” She sounds like my mom! And HER Mom! Uh-oh. Don’t let me use that phrase, ever. OK? If you don’t, we can’t be friends.

I Think We’ve All Known Ladies Like These!

With a renewed confidence and a surprise announcement to make soon, I’m going to write in my novel right now. Katie Fitzgibbons has been busy; therefore, I have been, too! I’ll get a good writing session in today. Then, time to watch Patrick Mahomes and his KC Chiefs annihilate Tom Brady and crew. In between, I’ll read about Angeline’s enlightenment. It’s going to be a wonderful Sunday with the Babe and our pups.

Hope your day is fabulous, too. Cozy up with a beverage and snack, it’s that kind of day. Thank you for reading. I welcome you back tomorrow, too. Be Safe. Take Care.