Satisfying Sunday

The wedding yesterday was so fun. It’s always so sweet to watch a couple just starting out. They are often a bit older than back in the day, they are established in their careers, they may even be homeowners already. This was such a memorable event because nearing the end of November, we were outside, with a beautiful Iowa cornfield as a backdrop. It was absolutely perfect, no wind or breeze, a warm late fall sun shining, and a couple who are clearly crazy about each other. The three sisters have all had beautiful weddings over the last couple years, all unique, all as special as they are. Their dad shed tears over each of his girls, and they were great hosts each time. It does our hearts good. The world is choosing to go on, with God’s grace. The Pandemic has been awful, many have lost hope, but we saw the future last night. It’s the hope, all rolled into these families who gathered. It’s in our hearts even today. Check out this beautiful venue!

And it’s come at a great time for me. I tend to get depressed over the next six weeks. I’m not alone, I know. It’s easier to admit that out loud, then I give voice to it. Over the last year or so, I’ve grappled with it, and I will conquer it again this year. Now, we have many things to celebrate; we both had COVID in October, and have no lasting effects from it. We’re grateful for our health, each other, our friends, relatives (well, most of them!), and I look forward to making Thanksgiving dinner. Many of the old standard dishes will be made. I’m trying mashed potatoes in the crock pot. I look forward to trying that out. It’ll be fun. My daughter has two toddlers, who would be fun. However, they spend holidays with her husband’s mom, she’s a widow, and her son is the only child. She would be seriously alone if they traveled. I’m perfectly fine with sharing my daughter with someone who may need her more than I do.

I read this morning may be we’re not as different as we think. I had to think about that quite a bit. Even kids without alcoholic parents have had bad experiences growing up. They’ve experienced feeling weak, lonely, their homes could have been disrupted by serious illness, not alcohol fueled havoc. And don’t get me wrong. Mom’s drinking got worse after I left home. My two younger brothers had completely different parents than my older brother and I had. But other kids have their own stories, scars, brave hopes. They may have had it worse than we did. It is possible.

I think families were very tight lipped when we grew up. If there was domestic violence, no one talked about it. It may have shown, the woman wearing makeup over her bruises to church. No one ever said anything. Children in that home grew up as unevenly as we did.

We are as imperfect and glorious as they are. They are not the enemy. We all have things. We all have bad memories. We all are deserving of good, safe, productive lives. We all deserve a safe, loving relationship, if that’s what we want. We may have to change some bad habits to have one. The one I had to change was not believe love hurts, to believe it truly existed, and good, solid single men existed. Once I let one walk into my heart, I’ve healed. I’m most grateful for that.

I’m going to spend the rest of the day reading and using my heating pad. This colder weather does a number on my back. It’s going to be a busy week, and I need to be better than I am right now. Lots of sitting at the keyboard last week. Have appointments all day tomorrow, so more busy happening. See you tomorrow!